The coverage ‘Univision’ provided was fucking boring, watching an old person try to climb up & down stairs. It was just that, their coverage was nothing but the Pope climbing up a plane & climbing down a plane. Also, Univision was the only one covering this so don’t expect to find NBC, CBS or any of those other networks to provide this. Why? I don’t know, pandering to Mexicans I guess.
Insult to injury, after Univision aired their last update of the pope climbing up a plane & heading to Italy, the next day they brought up some breaking news, The Hamburglar escapes!!!! Oh, sorry; I meant to say ‘El Chapo’ escapes!!!!! Same thing, right? But instead of hamburgers, he steals children’s souls, cocaine & human decency. El Chapo escapes from a shotty Mexican prison a day after the pope ends his tour of peace & optimism. Way to go humanity, GREAT JOB!!
I got something to say about this El Chapo escape, in 2001 El Chapo escapes by hiding inside a laundry cart. Big manhunt begins & lasted until earlier this year in 2015, caught in his mansion or hotel (I’m pretty sure in a bed with some obese lady ontop of him. Let that image sink into your mind.), then months later he escapes in a shower, IN PRISION. If he’s such a most wanted criminal, then why wasn’t security around him? Seriously, imagine if Hannibal Lector from ‘Silence of the Lambs’ didn’t have that bulletproof glass cell? It would have been a short ass movie. He escaped in a hole in the shower, WHY WAS THERE A SHOWER IN HIS JAIL CELL? Just shows you how corrupt the Mexican prison system is down there, JUST LIKE AMERICA! I bet he also got hookers & blow, why not give him a satellite laser that can scratch his ass while you’re at it!!
Great job Mexican Prison, while all of you were busy jacking it to calendars of some soccer centerfold (Presented by ‘TAKIS’), one of the world’s most sought after criminals escaped in a fucking tunnel with a motorcycle! Oh & way to raise the fervor that is the Mainstream media. Chapo this, Chapo that. At the Swap Meet I’m already seeing these printed on shirts with ‘El Chapo’ on them. This is ‘Scarface’ 1983 all over again, “Hee dope, yea yea!” NO HE’S NOT!!!! To all of you Chapo worshippers out there, go fuck a cactus!!!! Chapo isn’t a hero but what can I say, we live in a world obsessed by scum gurgling criminals.
Fuck El Chapo, I hope he gets shot in the anus. Then again I’m pretty sure there’s some person calling me a hypocrite for liking ‘The Punisher’. Difference between the two is Frank Castle kills criminals & is fictional, El Chapo is a paranoid fatass drug lord & he exists.
Oh & after the coverage of ‘El Chapo’ died off, Joan (Jo-an) Sebastian died, a Mexican singer & the Mexican media then jumped all over that. Funny how the media works. I have nothing to say about JoAn, not a fan so it doesn’t apply to me, maybe my parents got something to say. I‘ll see if they want to type a little something on this……Nope, they just pushed the keyboard away.
Mexico got no breaks the week before.
Summer in California is what it’s always been every year, warm as hell, insufferable full of rich bitches who can afford a pool, air conditioning or some kinda mist machine that shoots mist saying what great weather it is out there. So, what makes this year interesting? Summer storms. It rained on a summer’s day which astounds me, it was like seeing a twister in L.A. In the many years I’ve lived here I have never seen or experienced a rain storm in summer. Also, there were days when the skies would cloud & darken, but the temperature was still in the early 80’s, late 70’s, desert weather.
Amongst all this, the local news keeps on ‘foreshadowing’ this storm, a storm bigger than ‘El Nino’. You know ‘El Nino’? A once in a decade storm that is damn near close to being a hurricane. I swear, all these local news affiliates here in California have their heads up their own asses when talking about thunderstorms, as well as the California drivers because they drive like shit when it rains here in L.A (and I’m pretty sure elsewhere too). El Nino, the only weather storm named after a male without any subtlety. Seriously, every hurricane that hits the east is always named after some woman. About time someone named it after a Mexican boy, DOUBLE WHAM! El Nino is Spanish for ‘The Boy’ so in the end , equality wins. OI OI OI!!!!!!!!
So what does ‘El Nino’ lead me to rant about? The way the media continues to push the excuse of the drought, despite having several storms hit the state. Now I’m not talking about a few drips here & a few drips there, these were thunderstorms!!! And of course everyone keeps on saying “There’s a drought. Let’s look at the monthly statistics of which city used more water. Conservation is a group effort. Look at my wife have sex with a fracking drill!!” Now I’m all for conserving everything, food, water, power, but while we’re letting our fucking lawns & plants die off, Nestle & all these water bottling companies are being hogs & sucking California dry. If conserving water is such a group effort, why isn’t the city taking Nestle to task? After the story broke of Nestle not renewing permits that expired in 1988, they should be taken to task.
I’m sick of seeing these old guys with horrible pink tans come up on screen telling me why I shouldn’t water that plant outside, always using the excuse “We’re in a drought.” or my favorite “It’s because of a drought.” Why aren’t the same people that showed those pictures of the drying reservoirs (from a few months back) giving us an update picture? Have those puddles of water evaporated, or have the rainstorms helped? Why all of a sudden are water mains breaking? I’m pretty sure there are answers that aren‘t conspiracy theories. Why hasn’t anyone investigated that one case of the wrecked rubber shield that kept a reservoir intact? Some months back someone broke a shield that supplied water to some farmers & what has come of it? You’re telling me the FBI & CIA & all these government owned investigative departments can find a baggie of not too dank weed in between a person’s buttcheeks, but oh no, we’ can’t investigate who crudely broke a reservoir shield. What about the oil spill that hit the SoCal beaches not once, but twice & as of recent beach goers found white Crisco looking slop hitting the shores. How about the water mains & water pipes that keep on breaking, or how about recently Jerry Brown announced a state of emergency for a forest fire. It’s just a forest fire, not a fucking fire army pillaging San Diego. Part of me feels this is all some plan to fuck with the states’ water by using hired goons to contaminate & use up the state‘s water. Answer me that, Jerry Beans, I mean Jerry Brown!
I know there’s a reason for why forest fires start, some asshole didn’t properly turn off his or her (Equal opportunity) campfire or the plants were suicidal so they set themselves on fire, I would if I was a blade of grass with no purpose in life. But part of me believes the fires were set up. I don’t have the proof, so don’t quote me on it., don’t reference me or Blogababble, I’m not educated.
All in all, I’m sick of Californians not noticing the trend in this crisis that they so call ‘The Drought!’
IT RAINED MOTHAFUCKERS!!!!!
You know with all the media manipulation these ‘news people’ did all over the Baltimore protests & all the manufactured & censored stories, I expect a little more than this.
This pisses me off personally since I had to spend earlier this year out of the house as plumbers half assed their job, replacing the piping, all in an effort to conserve water. What was meant to be a week’s worth of work ended up being more! Spent two months leaving home, doing nothing but going to parks & being amongst fuckface dominoes players who you question whether they have decency or not. Part of my anger comes from that, but most of my anger comes from Jerry Brown pretty much handling this issue in the way of “Oh, water is being sucked dry from the land. (Gets blowjob from Nestle C.E.O) Don’t blame this on Peter Barbeck, It’s all your fault! I’m fining all of you if we ‘believe’ you use up too much water.”
Fuck you & your fucking wrinkles Jerry Brown!! He’s like that parent who just adopted a foster kid, only to shower him or her with gifts & love while you’re left alone & blamed for every single thing the foster kid did.
Fucked up analogy, I know but it happens man, it happens.
So I mentioned Conspiracy Theories, & I’m not a conspiracy theorist because I admit some conspiracy theories are shit, but I would be shocked if some of them come true.
So where am I getting at?
Pluto conspiracy theorists!
No claps, no gasps, not even the crickets are chirping. Just what I expected.
Yup, there are a group of Pluto conspiracy theorists who believe that Pluto doesn’t exist. Recently a satellite took some High Def photos of Pluto which amazed both the science community & space fan boys. Well, these conspiracy theorists are coming out, saying that all those photos are photoshopped & Pluto doesn’t exist. Hey, we all hate that shallow slut of a planet, but it still exists whether we like it or not. I’m not part of that group that continues to bicker over whether Pluto is or isn’t a planet, people be trippin’ when it comes to planets.
This issue is dumb, (For smart science people) they are dumb & I just wasted a perfectly good paragraph typing this useless crap. Now onto the next topic which might also be useless crap.
Cecil the Lion got SHIZOT in the TIZOT!! Who the fuck is Cecil & why is he a lion?
Wait a minute, is Cecil the Lion this Tommy Chong looking fucker?
I’m of two camps on this, whenever an animal is hunted down & shown on social media as their so-called ‘Trophy’ it’s sickening & angering. I’m an animal person, though I get freaked out at sharks, eels & rats, lions are awesome. Fucking Midwestern hunters need to get shot & hunted down & see how it feels like! Babies are veal, nah I’m kidding, never the kids. But these motherfuckers shouting their ‘God made animals so we can hunt them’ need to shut the hell up & get hunted at themselves! I’m also in the camp of “Who the fuck is Cecil the Lion & why is he the talk of the news?” What has this motherfucking lion done that caused such an uproar & lead to vigils? Did he cure aids? Did he solve global warming? WHO IS CECIL?
It was a media distraction, someone wanted us to be crying about a dead lion where as something worse is happening. Don’t know what it is, but this has been happening to much to where we can’t think it isn’t a distraction. This isn’t the first & only time a hunted animal has made news. Years ago Sarah Palin’s sperm bucket daughter shot an animal & posed in front of it with her rifle, Ted Nudget is notorious for being a well known animal hunter & I’m sure there’s are more that I haven’t touched on. What makes the death of Cecil the Lion unique? The animal had a name some PERSON put on him & the hunter wasn’t someone famous. The guy who shot the lion was a fucking Midwestern dentist who has a previous history of shooting animals, another reason why Dentists are sadistic assholes. Overall this Dentist guy needs to get shot legally & posed in front of by BDSM dominators & all of you need to shut the fuck up, it was a lion with a name. There are more fucked up issues we should all be crying about.
In more pointless news, Kelly Osbourne is now under scrutiny because of a comment she said.
‘Sigh’, I know people have the right to be outraged & cry foul, but when’s this going to stop? Seriously, can’t we have a day when no one gets outraged by anything anyone says? One day, It’s all I’m asking for.
Anyway, Kelly Osbourne was on the daytime talkshow ‘The View’, the show where anyone can‘t get a word in edgewise when the hosts start yaking away. I’m not a fan of the show, two reasons: I’m not a shallow woman & it’s typical daytime talkshow fodder.
So here’s the quote, Targeted to Donald Trump, everyone says is so ‘offensive’.
“If you kick every latino out of this country, then who is going to clean your toilet, Donald Trump?”
Now, I can see how people see it as a tad bit offensive, but I also see it as an honest mistake. Sometimes thinking of things to say ends up sounding different when spoken. I can tell she thought this was gonna be the comment that everyone will rally behind, but ended up sounding a little offensive. So I’m not at all mad at her comment, unlike Donald Trump’s hate filled comment. Celebrities can fuck up too, yet everyone sees celebrities as these fucking infallible gods.
The only people I’m seeing crying foul are these rich bitches who get paid $300 per hour & talk of their 401k & how they changed their native name just to be part of the screen actor‘s guild, latino celebrities are offended & I don’t give a fuck about the rich & the rich don’t give a fuck about the average worker, unless something bad happens to the average worker so they can get the postive PR. Stick that dick back into your mouth & shut up, rich latinos.
I’m not saying everyone’s based off the common stereotype, but not all illegal immigrants are working in high rises, earning 1000 per hour & going home to their mansions with their kids college fund all taken care of. Face it rich latinos, not everyone’s working white collar jobs, they’re getting the work they can find & they aren‘t phased by KELLY Osbourne. Now I’m not saying all Mexicans/ Latinos are working blue collar jobs, but not everyone’s living it up in the east side.
As for Kelly Osbourne, the only time I saw her was as a goth girl in the early 2000’s when she burped on live TV for some awards show, she toned down from her rambunctious goth past & is now a business woman. Instead of saying ‘latinos’, she should have said ‘Illegal Immigrants’, that may have spared her the outrage from rich latinos who think they speak for the working Latino. I’m not seeing any outrage unlike the Donald Trump fiasco, so it’s all good. Now all we need to hear is a response from Kelly Osbourne, but I doubt she’ll need one. All in all one word screwed up her point & we as people need to work on our critical thinking.
So the Sunday this past week, ABC & ESPN aired the opening ceremony of the annual Special Olympics & I must say the opening ceremony was just beautiful. It inspired the hell out of me!
Before seeing the ceremony, I thought the Special Olympics was just a local thing where athletes statewide compete in the stadium. I was wrong, it’s on par with the real Olympics where athletes worldwide walk the carpet as millions of people on the stands cheer on. I tuned out once Eva Longoria came up to the stand, fuck that racist bitch whore, damn her to hell. I also tuned out when Avril’s pop music started playing (not a fan), but stuck around for that ‘Reach out L.A’ song, it reminded me of some 90’s rave song. Overall, the opening ceremony was a good break from the Saturday night monotony of boring programming, depressing news stories & the worst offender of all, Paid Programming.
So I can’t tell you who won, but I’m sure they don’t give everyone a medal. If that were the case, I would see that as an offense. They’re athletes, treat them as such. Reasons as to why I don’t know the results of the games? I don’t have ESPN, I got a type of Dyslexia that’s also an acronym which means I suck at math.
The special Olympics weren’t the only thing I caught on that boring Saturday night, there’s a channel I discovered on the on screen guide called ‘Newsmax’. I’ve heard of a channel called ‘The Blaze’ which was owned by Glenn Beck, so that pretty much shows you the extent in their so called journalistic ‘Credibility’. So there was a movie which peaked my curiosity titled ‘Border’. I missed the first few minutes of the documentary, I caught on in a scene where a fairly old woman was talking to the camera on what she did to make it to Texas since she is an illegal immigrant. She hid inside a sewer pipe full of waste & rats. And that is the only time you’ll get some prospective on illegal immigrants, the rest was two hours of a propaganda recruitment film, disguised as a documentary, on the nut bags known as the Minutemen.
So the whole of the documentary is following these armed idiots near the border as they set up camps, brandish off their guns & do nothing. Then the scenes of these people doing nothing cuts to a black screen with white words providing us some ‘Exposition’, all things that could have been recorded & documented. In this expository narration, the directors write something along the lines of “Our team found 20 illegals marching towards our camping spot, but they suddenly turned back when they saw us.” or cut to some newsroom footage or simulated computer animation reenacting what happened. Then after that it would fade into a scene of some cowboy idiot talking to the camera how he stood tall like some Civil War hero, even though his exploits weren‘t documented & shown. The whole documentary is just that, fading to black with exposition that could have been recorded, but since these (saying this loosely) ‘filmmakers’ are so full of shit it just provides all the more to not take these fuck bags seriously.
Along with the shotty editing,, we get introspective from stupid farmers who talk of how they were affected when some random illegal immigrants destroyed their farming equipment with no rhyme or reason. “Dey broked duh farmin tool! I gat no reason, it cuz dey savages.” Also there was some white haired bitch in the documentary who was doing some badly informed presentation to the idiotic masses as she ‘reports’ that all illegals coming into the state have diseases ‘Murica whiped away!’ & how they are infecting america. Um, she does know that Mexico has hospitals & clinics? I doubt it, I think the basis of her research came from that one hilarious yet racist & insensitive episode of ‘The Adventures of Superman’ where Clark, Lois & Jimmy go to the savage jungles of Mexico where everyone’s tribal & shit. Overall, she’s full of shit & in the end credits it’s stated that she’s dead. THANK YOU!! WOO HOOO!!! She’s the devil’s playwhore now.
Oh Jebus, you shouldn’t say that. Don’t disrespect the dead.
Well her ignorance & bad education started it, but then again this is Texas, the state that recently & legally erased Slavery & Jim Crow Laws from their state curriculum & textbooks with McDougall Littel’s pussy ass blessing. DING DONG THE WHITE HAIRED BITCH IS DEAD WITCH OLD BITCH? THE BITCHY BITCH!!! Good riddance!
There was also a scene in which some cowboy haired asshat talks to some ‘illegals’ for some ‘intel’ which can be heard through a hidden microphone. Yeah, he just asks some Mexican guy where he can get his truck fixed, comes back to the camera & tells the filmmaker “We got intel that those guys are the same gang that broke our farming EKKIPMENT!!!
The final ‘action scene’ (if you could call it that) is black & white night vision footage of faceless illegal immigrants walking in a trail through the woods with words popping up on screen saying how these thirty or so are carrying drugs, the street value of these said drugs & just more marching from the illegal quartet, THAT WAS ALL. Then of course it was followed by this guy’s exploits of how he controlled the problem, with no footage to back his claims. For all I know, they could have been the same white guys dressed in borderline racist, illegal immigrant clothing, walking a trail & having the filmmakers fix it in post.
The film has it all, ass backwards cowboy hat wearing Texans, night vision footage & tons & tons & tons of racists trying to act like they aren’t racist, you can easily tell they’re trying to hide it since no one asked the question of “Would they be there if it was anyone but Mexicans who are illegally crossing to the US?”
To all of you, America isn’t the only one with an Illegal Immigration problem. Britain, France, Spain, Japan, it’s a global thing.
Ending with an out of context quote by JFK, ‘Border’ is a torch to the brain, a rusted safety pin to the nipples & a wooden stake to the nuts, but worst of all it’s a rape to the mind. The film is an endurance test to see if you can watch it all the way through without going out with a hatchet & killing a random person. Full of accusations without any video proof, the film is a glorious window into ‘Murican stupidity, right winged paranoia & racism equal to that of an old lady luring colored children into her home so she can imprison them in her basement. And that was my film critic’s way of expressing my thoughts of this flick.
I don’t want to recommend this to everyone, unless you’re a masochist (kinda like me) & needs to ignite some anger within themselves (like me) because I get nagging suspicions when it gets too peaceful.
Now I’m not denying that there aren’t assholes who cross the borders for fucked up shit. Cyotes are assholes & so are these drug cartels, but it’s always one of every 100 people, rather than every illegal who crosses the border as the documentary says. To all of you who worked on this train wreck of a fucking film, go fuck yourselves with a cactus, sideways!
Now that I got my opinion out of the way, let’s look at the hilarity that is the DVD cover.
-The New York Times-
I’m sure they’re talking about the documentary rather than the content.
To end out everything, I offended a group of people on Tumblr for a humorous fake quote I posted.
Who did I offend? Was it a race? Never. Was it a religion? Nope. Was it PBS? No.
I offended Female republicans!!! Female republicans? On Tumblr?!!! I thought republicans were so tough & strong & didn‘t give a fuck what people said. Well, these Republicans took the fake quote seriously & got riled up
To all you free-thinking rebel conservatives, I know I’m speaking to the very tiny minority. I don’t know if I won or if the conservatives won since I had a lot of people sharing & liking, without any indication whether each person reblogged or liked the post for my content or for the response of the female repubs. I know some feminist blogs have reblogged it, so I’m pretty sure I know where their stance is on this.
The quote oozes irony & satire, most of the republicans I’m hearing about on the news are all Anti-woman, hence why I’m boggled at the idea of a female republican who voted for these clowns who spew their misogynist ramblings. Now I’m not just talking about their stances on abortion, but their stances on education for women, planned parenthood, Food Stamps, women on the workforce & the worst offender of all, Rape. Mike Huckabee is one everyone knows for his “Rape is god’s way of telling women to not be whores” stint which should have caused riots. Was it Mike Huckabee? I don’t know, all repubs look the same, old white guys who are stupider than they look. These people who keep on spewing their Traditional Family Values’ want women back in the kitchen, barefoot, pushing out babies & that’s all I’m hearing. I know there are some who don’t fall into the category, but they’re the minority.
What makes me laugh at the whole thing is I wrote this quote months ago & now it’s getting discovered. I can’t remember the basis as to why I wrote the fake quote, I know I read something about Republicans & women which riled me up, but can’t remember the exact story. Eh, all in all it did it’s job.
Republicans today have screwed up their once progressive party, more than it already was. I know a few repubs who look at people like Rand Paul, Sarah Palin, FOX NOOZE & all those fucking clowns & think ‘My god, how did it come to this? I just want 1950’s prices & a peaceful suburbia (without the racism) back, I don’t want to live in some Nazi conformist dreamland.’ Then again, as stated, they’re the minority.
I’m not democrat, nor am I republican; political parties are stupid & are they really essential to voting? No! The only reason they’re there is so some asshat running politician could send you junk mail or as Appalachians call it ‘FREE TOILET PAPER’. Not only that but some clipboard holding fuckface can interrupt you on your busy ass day just so they can make sure whether you’re voting for someone you voted on once & later on regret on that choice.
While I’m at the topic of poking fun of political parties, let’s offend Democrats, fucking PC new age pussies who can’t stand hearing opinions that don’t fit their sensibilities. Disguised as ‘critical thinkers’ they bitch at specific opinions while embracing their whitening hair, driving shitty looking hybrids & wave their John Green books at our face.
As you can tell I’m against the two party system.
So do you guys think my fake quote was funny? Does it go over your head? Did you think I went a little overboard & agree with both the Jewish page & the Conservative page?
Email, Comment, hit me with your opinions!
…and to all, a happy new year.