It was a slow news week, nothing really ‘grinded my gears’ or ‘whooped my cough’ so I’m going to rush into these a news stories.
NEWS WE CAN OOZE:
Cat Saves Boy From Dog
‘Sigh.’ SHUT THE HELL UP WITH THIS!!!! It’s been the top story of…everything. We get it, a cat attacked a dog because cats are bitches. I won’t discuss it further, but of course after this the adoptions in cats will be high and every dog will be considered ‘a menace to children everywhere’ because we live in a shitty, jaded, ignorant society where everyone’s judgmental. Not all pitbulls are dangerous, not all dogs are dangerous, not all Muslims are terrorists!!!!!!!!
But republicans are dumb, the ones that are in power though. There are republicans who are seeing the republicans on power and saying “They’re not republicans, they’re idiots.”
AT&T/ Direct TV Merger
Mergers are good for the people who are getting money, bad for us customers. No competition is dumb, it basically limits us (The Consumers) to fewer choices, shitty customer service and higher internet & cable bills. I’m not sure if this merger happened yet or was agreed to, but I wonder how that merger money will be spent on?
Boats?
Private Jets?
Crack Party?
Big Boob grannies?
The possibilities are endless for businessmen & women in 2014!
Immigration Reform is Dead
Yup, it’s dead and I’m not sure when it’ll come back, and who is to blame but the men & women who are all for ‘Family Values’ but split Mexican families apart because of crossing a line. I swear, if I had my own nation that neighbored a country, I’d welcome all because borders are nothing but lines and walls built by people who are afraid of things that aren’t the same as they are.
Just to let everyone know I’m all for families or fathers or mothers wanting a better future, but you have these shitbag drug smugglers who had to ruin it for the rest of them. Yup, drug smugglers, cartels & cumbags ruined illegal immigration, as well as 9/11 but let’s blame the ones who look and smell like shit, Drug Cartels.
Fuck Bill O’ Riley. & that was NEWS WE CAN OOZE
PS: Please don’t use Blogababble as a news source.
I’m a hardcore Arthur fan, been one since birth and the older episodes continue to be funny despite having been aired two decades ago.
What I’ll say now is the current season has good ideas for stories, teaching viewers to stand up for their creative rights; but my beef with them is that for some reason every episode has to have a message or educational merit. Hopefully they make some episodes that are just fun, without the preachy message. Also the humor is dry, it talks down to kids rather than let’s them find out. What made Arthur stand out was it’s mix of intelligent humor and often times subversive humor, like that scene where DW is scared of a Bear kissing a chicken or Buster in women’s clothes watching himself watching T.V, and intelligent characters. The jokes are flat, it’s the type of humor you’d hear in a ‘Family Friendly’ show or movie, the subversive humor is gone & the references to real people (like Sylvia Plath or Clinton) are now gone. Also it seems the writers change their characters just to make a preachy point, like Arthur treating Sue Ellen unfairly just to make a point about watching what we say.
Well enough of my bitching, here’s my Top 26 Arthur Episodes.
26. Love Notes For Muffy: I love this episode mainly because the smartest character in the show ‘Brain’ becomes so angry at Muffy, he becomes crazy with vengeance & creates a mock love letter for Muffy just so she can be heartbroken later. May I remind you these are third grade kids. This episode makes me laugh by Brain’s presence & his ‘Moby Dick’ attitude of getting his revenge at Muffy, who he believes will win a science contest.
23. Bitzi’s Beau: This episode deals with Buster’s mom meeting a new man (since she’s a divorcee) and Buster worries that her new boyfriend may split their Mother/ Son relationship & has a nagging suspicion that her new boyfriend is an alien who is out to abduct them using Boston Cream Pie as a teleportation device. I don’t have divorced parents, but it does give a good understanding of what children may feel in times like that.
Binky: Hahahah!!! No ifs ands or butts.
20.Arthur Rides the Bandwaggon: This is another episode that gives me nostalgia & I’m pretty sure relates to all of us who have rode on trends as kids. Arthur Reed is in the middle of a ‘Woogle’ trend. He finds the trend of these Woogles, some weird gummy toy that talks when you give them a squeeze, to be dumb and pointless, but then tries hard not to succumb to temptation to get a Woogle of his own.
Best Moment:
Buster: Hey Arthur, did you get one of those ‘Poogles’?
19. Muffy Gets Mature: This episode oozes late 90’s/ Early 2000’s. This episode was in response to that trend of kids wanting to act older that they are. I like it because I do, not really a good reason.
Best Moment:
Buster: How do you know Dopey & Sneezy?
17. Attack of the Turbo Twins: Again, this episode gives me nostalgia from a time when ‘Power Rangers’ kicked ass and parents hated it because it was ‘too violent’. I love this episode because the Tibble Twins watch this Power Rangers like show & act crazier than they were before. They wear costumes from the show and bust D.W’s lip with the seat from a swing set. Best Episode EVER!!!
Best Moment:
(DW tries to write her name)
Arthur: (reads) Doba Minifed Reefed? Who’s that?
DW: It’s hopeless! :(
Best Moment:
Tommy Tibble: If you can read, what does that say?
(Points to the brand logo on the television named 'Elbo-Zonic'.)
DW: Uhh, it says 'Television'.
14: DW’s Name Game: I think I learned more insults in this episode than any HBO show ever. DW and Arthur are at odds with each other and when all else fails, Arthur & DW consult a Thesaurus for their insults. Although I don’t agree with the message, it’s a funny and awesome episode with a funny talking dinosaur called ‘The Thesaurus’.
Best Moment:
DW: You.. Are… Tedious!
13: The Shore Thing: The story is simple, Arthur & his friends expect to go to a water park but find something much better at a place Arthur’s dad titled ‘Ocean Zone’ which is still a funny name. It’s an alright episode, but I say this episode has a beautiful looking sunset. I like sunsets.
12: DW’s Very Bad Mood: The greatest episode involving DW in the whole series. You have DW in her angriest, raising hell & taking everyone with her. You later learn why she’s bitchy, but I won’t say it here, you’ll have to watch that episode.
Best Moment:
DW: Go… Go…home. I too tired to think of anymore mean things to say.
11. Arthur’s Knee: A cautionary tale about Arthur who decides to go into a junkyard to find a tire & ends up getting his knee cut open by a rusty can of lima beans. The episode provides a pretty easy and neat explanation of how infections penetrate the human body.
Best Moment:
DW: I got to learn about Tetris shots & Indianapolis.
9. That’s a Baby Show: This one’s relatable to me, I still to this day watch cartoons & children’s programming, despite what others may say. This is a fine tale of Arthur & his fascination of a psychedelic show called ‘Love Ducks’. While under scrutiny from his peers, Arthur then shows them how great the show is.
Best Moment:
Arthur: I have a baby sister!!
8. Mom & Dad Have a Great Big Fight: This episode isn’t that dark or serious, but it does give us a sense that the Reed family is not as clean & happy as everyone thought. DW overhears her parents fighting (which sounds like ‘robble robble robble’) which leads her & Arthur to ponder the possibilities of Divorce. It’s quite a funny episode despite the themes depicted.
Best Moment:
Parents bickering from afar: Robble robble robble!!
7. DW’s Tale Spins: Don’t confuse this for the episode ‘I’d Rather Read it Myself’, this is an episode in which DW does a retelling of ‘The Odyssey’ for Buster & Arthur. Although Arthur seems like a dick in this episode, DW proves him wrong by telling him that stories don’t always have to be told in books, but shared by telling those stories aloud.
Best Moment:
The greek sirens dancing to ‘Crazy Bus’.
6. My Music Rules: What other show will you ever see both ‘YoYo Ma’ and ‘Josh Redman’ appear in the same show? Nowhere, except Arthur. DW & Arthur begin to fight over who should make their appearance at the local library which leads to musical scrutiny. DW does not care for jazz so she agrees to have YoYo Ma (popular Cellist) while Arthur wants Josh Redman (popular Jazz musician) since he’s not one for Classical music. The episode shows that not everyone should be restricted to only listening to one kind of music & also leads to a perfect collaboration of ‘Crazy Bus’ played by both YoYo Ma & Josh Redman.
Best Moment:
DW: Yo MaMa says he’s coming!
5. The Last of Mary Moo Cow: I’m sure all of us here had some favorite show cancelled for no reason & moved on with our lives. DW, on the other hand, decides to take matters into her own hands & begins a petition to resurrect her favorite cow. Best Moment:
Mary Moo Cow: A petition, can you spell petition, spell petition.
Kids: P.E.T oh..Something Something Something!
4. The Great MacGrady: This one’s a serious episode in which the school chef who we all know as ’Ms. MacGrady’ tells everyone that she has cancer. At this point in the series the humor fell flat, but the story was still engaging enough for viewing. This is a very special episode that’s come around in a while since it seems that other shows don’t bother with ‘Special Episodes’ anymore. Give this one a try.
3.Buster Hit’s the Books: In this episode we learn that Buster isn’t a fan of books or reading, so it’s up to Francine & Arthur to help him read. This episode is funny since Buster reads half the books he’s given which ranged from a Dr.Seuss-like book, a book that was meant to be a ‘Charlie & the Chocolate Factory’ spoof & a baby book called ‘Blue’. It’s a funny episode & proves what I’ve always been saying, “It’s not that kids don’t want to read, it’s that kids are forced to read books they don’t want to read.”
Best Moment:
Dog in a story: Woof, Woof.
2.The Scare Your Pants Off Book Club: This is a great episode & perfect introduction to the series. An early episode in which Arthur & his friends find out that their favorite book, The Scare Your Pants Off (Similar to the ‘Goosebumps’) books are under threat when Muffy’s father wants all the books to be censored from book shops & libraries. A kids show teaching kids the 100 things that are wrong with Censorship, now that’s how you talk to kids there. Best Moment:
The writer of the ‘Scare Your Pants off’ books confronts Muffy’s dad.
Best Moment:
Tina the Talking Tabby .
After writing & erasing outline drafts, I am proud to say I have made the right outline draft & 'He Came Tumbling After' will be written. It's going to be a thrilling & jarring mini-series that will be read here only. I hope all of you will be able to read it. I'm going to start it tomorrow so I'm going to call it a day, moo to you too.